A Purple Periwinkle

Have you ever had a moment in your life when the meaning/symbolism you associated with an object changed over the span of a couple of months or a few years? It’s bound to have happened to everyone at some point or another. In your mind, you associate something with a memory or an emotion and you just wake up one day, realizing that it’s meaning has completely changed; perhaps even inverted.

About a year ago, I fell in love with this crazy girl.  In my warped mind, ‘crazy’ is just about the highest compliment I can pay someone. To me, ‘crazy’ implies a person who is weird (just the right amount), good-natured, imaginative, fun and above all has a beautiful soul [She was all that so I naturally fell for her].

Just to be crystal clear; in my opinion, ‘crazy’ = awesome 😉

She had actually fallen for me a couple of months before I did. I never looked at her in ‘that way’. To me she was just a good friend. We really started talking to each other the day she confessed her feelings for me. After a while it became obvious that she was pretty cool and deserving of my signature-seal-of-approval-word, ‘crazy’. I decided that I liked her enough to give her a chance. So being ‘silly old romantic me’, I thought I would tell her how I felt with a flower. I began the search for a perfect flower (just a rose or random flower wouldn’t do. It had to be something that encompassed perfectly, the person that she was). I filtered through grandma’s extensive collection of backyard flora until I discovered it – a purple periwinkle !

wpid-p_20150223_182110.jpg

Why a purple periwinkle you ask ?

 

  • Her favourite colour was purple (the most obvious reason).
  • This was the only flower I found that was dual coloured. It was purple on top and white on the bottom. I felt this represented how unique she was. (This was the reason that confirmed my choice)

Within the span of just two months, we had grown so close to a point where we could understand what the other was thinking without words being shared [Insert all the cliché romantic stuff you can find here]. It was intense, exhilarating and I had honestly never felt this way about someone before. Then it inexplicably happened. At the end of two months, right on our anniversary day she decides to break up with me; says she’s sorry and that her love was just a lie; that I was just a rebound. I was just stunned. Just that morning she wished me a ‘Happy Anniversary’ and within a couple of hours it was all over. I felt suffocated; as thought I was being strangled by some invisible entity. I had put everything I had into this relationship and just like that it was over. It felt worse than a kick in the family jewels and I’ve had my share of those.

What I couldn’t understand (and still can’t) was how we could go from being one person to being split into two completely different people with nothing tying us together. It felt like a javelin had been thrust into me. See the thing was, I didn’t really mind that we wouldn’t be going out anymore you know? All I cared about was that she was still a part of my life; that I could still talk to her and hang out as friends at the very least. That didn’t happen. I was completely ignored. She didn’t want anything to do with me after that. I was yesterday’s news; dumped in the metaphorical trash can. I’d never felt so depressed before.

Pretty soon, the purple periwinkle had come to represent something completely different. Where the dual colours of the flower once symbolised her unique personality, it now stood for the two facets of her being that was shown me – the caring compassionate creature full of love and happiness that I fell in love with and the completely contradictory selfish and indifferent personality that she transformed into.

The very object that had started it all had now changed into something so vile and putrid that I never wanted to see another periwinkle ever again for as long as I lived. The essence of that object was lost.

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Resurrecting a dead blog !

Phew … Life has been crazy these past few months. Stuff I’m involved in right now :

  • A writing blog (the one you are reading right now)
  • photoblog
  • flickr account
  • Writing a book
  • Developing an app
  • Learning the nitty-gritty bits of guitar all of which have left me grasping for time.

(Plus, there’s an Arduino clone on its way :’) Yay !)

I suck at time management. I am probably the world’s #1 procrastinator. I head out to get something done and have this weird thought and then the next thing you know I’m reading random Wikipedia articles and watching YouTube videos, all barely related to the initial thought itself.

(By the way, what’s up with those weird YouTube suggestions? In the suggestions area, there will always be this one weirdly titled video that seems so out of place that you just have to watch it. Before you even know it, you’re watching videos titled “how to quit smoking”. Funny part about this you ask ? I have NEVER touched a cigarette in your life and here I am trying to figure out how to quit)

YouTube Fail

I hate bollywood movies Youtube. You should understand this because I have never watched a single trailer. Why then do you suggest it to me ? WTF?

 

Wow ! I just did it again – strayed from the topic. See what I mean about getting distracted? *sigh*

So anyway, I’ve been going through my previous posts on this blog and the horrors I experienced have been unimaginable since. I’ve been cringing for hours now at how immature and stupid lil old me used to be. I ended up deleting more than half of all my old posts. I have decided to start again and use this blog ONLY  for writing. I’ve got a ton of ideas for future posts just lying around in the deep dark recesses of my mind. 

Until said future posts,

Cheers 😛

Dying Memories

Each time I look around,
at things come and gone;
I remember the little things you did,
that made us so strong.

A gentle smile here,
a naughty wink there;
all just to show me,
how much you really cared.

In the flash of a moment,
it ended just as soon as it began;
two months of happiness,
betrayed by a single kiss.

“I cant do this anymore”
with watery eyes crestfallen;
the river carved a valley down the sides of your face,
I fell down an endless warren.

A place of madness and despair,
a place where I pulled at my own hair;
Of eternal darkness and receding hope,
that there wasn’t a single niche that I could grope.

I could not begin to fathom,
that your love was but a ruse;
I had loved you truly,deeply;
which was why my heart was bruised.

64 days of pure bliss,
followed by 120 of mourning;
you never really loved me you said,
the Dubbo I knew was dead.

I sit here in silent darkness,
thinking of what could have been;
my hands flow across the page,
writing a dirge for my dying queen.

– Oliviera Carvalho

Oh. My. God !

So, I found the most epic parkour YouTube channel recently (GalizianUrbanProject) … Well not actually … Its actually a hybrid of parkour and free running .. but its definitely something even the purists should check out …
I stumbled across it while checking out this parkour dedicated tumblr along with some awesome PK memes …
Back to this channel .. the videos are so beautiful guys .. I swear to you .. I actually cried watching them … The motion, skill, flow, music and the cinematic shots ..just absolutely stunning …I have become so inspired the past couple of days that I’ve started doing random pushups and stuff, trying to get back into shape .. Watch the videos called “Maybe” and “Clean Your Mind” first ..I wish I could embed them here but I’m editing this post on my phone so its kinda hard to do that .. I’ll definitely put up the links in a couple of days thiugh, when I have access to a computer …
I really cant undersfand why these videos arent viral instead of those stupid cat videos .. it makes no sense … The world is messed up .. very few are able to appreciate the beauty of motion and flow

Now, I could blame the mossy walls and environment for not training as much as I should … But the fact is that i’ve been lazy, plain and simple ..

In other news, I’ve been planning to learn android programming by the end of January ..I already know the java programming language, so the transition to Android shouldnt be that difficult … I have a list of apps I want to develop among them being an “Ultimate PK” app and a manga reader … No apps in those categories are up to the standard set by other apps in the play store and app store , so I take it as an opportunity to develop something awesome …

I have started reading One Piece recently … Pretty good stuff .. Luffy is awesome .. a friend suggested it to me a while back but I only remembered it recently..

Oh, check out this song : The Middle by Jimmy Eat World ..its a song I heard long qgo but only found out the name of recently .

P.S : In case you missed it, the name of the youtube channel is GalizianUrbanProject !

The Millennium

Well it has been a long time …. I have been away for what seems like ages, but I assure you … There’s a good reason behind my absence .
The fact is, I have been chosen to be a part of a group …. A group working on something huge …. A project kept under wraps for almost a month now …. Its a pretty risky and herculean undertaking.
I shall let you in on the secret in a few hours time, when we reveal the project to the entire world . It is gonna be fantastic (worthy of fireworks fantastic) !
Hold on to your hats ladies and gents, something big is coming your way !

P.S – The title of this post is a clue to what we have been working on !
Sorry this post has been this short, the amount of work left is huge. Gotta go !

Ordinary people …… or Superheroes ?

Wow !! It’s been so long since my last post that I nearly forgot I even have a blog ….. I wish I could say that I haven’t been posting recently because I have been terribly busy or uninspired or some other reason …… The fact is that I’ve just been lazy lately plain and simple …..

So I was sitting for my monthly haircut in this barber shop recently and I got this amazing idea.
[I always get inspirational ideas in weird places ….. usually when I’m pretty bored ….. I’m sure this happens to a lot of you guys as well]

What if the people we encountered on a regular basis like salesmen, accountants, barbers, bus conductors, taxi drivers were in fact extraordinary superheroes . I mean what if they had real superpowers and you didn’t know it. Heck, they could have even probably saved your life a couple of times without you ever knowing. That really gives you something to think about doesn’t it? If two billionaires (Bruce Wayne & Tony Stark) can pull of being part time superheroes, don’t you think that it would be possible for ordinary people to pull it off too.

These guys that you see everyday and pay no attention to could actually be saving lives everyday and punishing baddies while you are at home enjoying a good night’s sleep. It really gives you a reason to be nice to the people around you, because you never know the guy you help out today could be doing a lot more for you tomorrow.

Along parallel lines, what if there were special people assigned to protect you because you are responsible for an important discovery or innovation in the future ? These guys could be watching your back and you probably never notice them.

Song I recommend : Just One Last Time – David Guetta